First impressions are everything and you literally have only 7 seconds to make a good first impression. That is why it is essential you master the art of making a good first impression.
1. Make A Fresh Impression.
Make sure you give yourself time to get ready. If you go to your date straight from it’s going to be obvious. You’ll be wearing the day, you won’t be fresh, and your body language will be work mode. You will scream, I could be bothered to put any effort or time to polish your look.
If you come straight from work you wouldn’t have decompressed from your day and your date will be like a business meeting, boring, stressful and unfortunately you probably won’t get another date you will be seen as a colleague. Plus you will have the stuffiness of work on your clothes. No matter how sedentary your job is after your commute and wearing your clothes for over 8 hours it isn’t very fresh at all and if your date has a sensitive nose, it could mean goodbye.
Instead have a relaxing bath, wash your hair and style it, put on some nice fragrance or cologne. Did you know that smell is one of the most powerful aphrodisiacs? So make sure you are smelling fresh. Make sure you wear something complimentary that shows off your assets.
Women, it’s either cleavage or legs, not both.
2. Relax and Be You!
Unless you want to act the rest of your life, you are going to have to learn to be yourself and let the cards fall as they may. No need to pretend, or say the things your date wants to hear. Your date will love it when you are being your authentic self. So if you want to order the steak, order the steak, or if you are feeling nervous have a giggle and let your date know. Laughing about it will make your date relax and allow the two of you to connect. If you are an absolute chatterbox.
Make a conscious effort to listen while your talks and you won’t have to worry about yammering a hundred miles a minute and sending them running.
Keep in mind chances are your dates a little nervous too. So remind yourself to relax and enjoy. You may even figure out that grabbing their attention really isn’t so hard after all. It’s all about connecting.
3. Manners Matter
Manners and politeness seem to go hand in hand. Swearing and talking negatively about anything is a HUGE turnoff. Just thing about how you feel around someone who is complaining about their day, the weather, work, other people, or how hard done by they are, you want to run, don’t you? Negativity is a repellent for attraction.
On the other hand think about how you feel around some warm, friendly who is complimentary and appreciates the day, the venue, their company. You want to be around them, don’t you? Their positivity draws you in.
Make sure you take a leaf out of the latter’s book and keep things light and positive. Also, avoid any serious discussions about politics; religion, money or babies, there will be plenty of time for that later. It’s also important to be genuinely open and honest. This is something that is magnetically appealing.
4. Focus On Your Date: Make Them Feel A Million Dollars.
Ever been on a date when all the person did was talk about themselves so much that you barely get a word in.
On the other hand, ever been on a date with someone that focuses purely on you, asks you questions, listens attentively and makes you feel special?
It’s not rocket science as to which date was a better experience.
When you are on your date focus on your date and make them feel a million dollars. This is a brilliant strategy, not only does it ignite attraction it actually melts away any nerves that you may have. The secret to happiness is focusing on others, showing appreciation and validation.
When you are on your date maintain eye contact, ask appropriate upbeat questions, actively listen, smile, show your light-hearted sense of humour and be in the present moment. This is the key to igniting attraction.
5. Be Prepared With Ice-Breakers.
You know nerves can get the better of you and you can end up jibber-jabbering about nothing or worse still awkward silences so silent you hear crickets.
If you talk on and on about you, this can get tiresome for the other person. It will also make you appear self-centred and disinterested. This would have to be one of the top turn-offs.
If you have awkward silences they could get bigger and bigger as the night goes on and then you’re left twiddling your thumbs.
To prevent yourself from this disaster make sure you are prepared to avoid the awkward silences by having a few ice-breakers up your sleeve.
Ask questions about hobbies, passions and interests.
6. Eye Contact Creates Chemistry and Trust.
This factor ties into point five but deserves a little more explanation. When you are creating a first impression you want to remove doubt and create certainty. If you aren’t able to look a person in the eyes and hold contact, you’re telling them a few things.
One is that you are incredibly nervous and that’s okay. Another is he may think you aren’t being truthful, that you’re hiding something or are very insecure. This will work against you.
The mind is a wondrous thing but has a tendency to create trouble whether it’s warranted or not. It doesn’t take long for someone to take a thought and turn it into reality, particularly if it’s negative. And the last thing you want to do is have your date thinking you are insincere and lack self-esteem. This can all happen in a matter of seconds. If you don’t look your date in the eyes and show them you are open, truthful they might just slip away.
Studies have proven that eye contact promotes feelings of intimacy and releases those special love hormones that promote falling in love.
7. Make your Date Laugh
This is a fantastic quality to have. If you can make a person laugh, you’re one step up on anyone else. Laughter really is the best medicine.
It helps to diffuse those inevitable uncomfortable moments. It also shows that you are relaxed and easy-going, someone that would make good partner material. So if you’ve got it use it. If you don’t have it, please don’t try and “make” things funny. That’s just a disaster waiting to happen. Instead, laugh at his jokes, relax the mood with a smile.
You can always work on your humour, but keep it simple. Making a person laugh and smile will give you a pass straight to their heart.
8. Compliments Ignite Attraction
When you are looking to capture a person’s heart, complimenting them is a powerful way to igniting attraction. There’s nothing nicer than receiving a genuine compliment when dating. Well maybe not nothing, but you know what I mean.
Tell your date the things you like about them. All men like validation, if he talks to you about his accomplishments give him praise, or compliment him on his physique, highlight his amazing muscle, height or sexy eyes. When you do compliment him tonality is everything, keep it cheeky with flirtatious body language.
9. Never Talk About Your Ex.
I’m sure you already know this but I can’t stress it enough. The last thing you want to do is start talking negative. Emotions and logic just don’t mix and even though you may “think” you are talking generally about your ex.
It “rarely” comes off that way. Nobody need to know about your baggage, it isn’t a therapy session. Make your date feel special. It’s amazing what happens when you make someone feel incredible they tend to do the same to you. What goes around comes around.
10. A Kiss Goodnight
The physical is very important in any relationship. So it’s important you show him at least a little bit of the physical. A kiss at the end of a night sends him a nice big positive message.
It says you want more. The style of how you kiss is up to you.
A simple soft peck on the cheek with a soft touch on his forearm a smile and eye gaze will send the message of intimacy and passion and the message of I like you, let’s take things slow. A passionate kiss at the end of your date speaks for itself. He will know he is in and may work at a fast pace with you.
If you really do want him to be in his head, this is your first step.
My Thoughts . . .
These steps are going to help you with a game plan to capture that man you have your eyes on. It’s not about being perfect at any one of these steps. But rather understanding and knowing how to apply them is what matters. Practice makes perfect and it’s time to get practising.